nandanandan -sudarshan sianh 'chakr'
73. chandravali-ras mean man bhang
vah chhaliya svapn ke saman aya tha hamare madhy aur ham unmadini ho gayian. ham usase roothane lagian. vah to svapn ke saman hi adrishy ho gaya. ab is phoote kapal ko pitane-krandan karane se kya hona hai. sab kahati haian, sab bholi sakhiyaan samajhati haian ki aparadh unaka hi hai. koee is adhama chanchala chandravali ko kosati nahian. koee ise dosh nahian deti; kiantu maian kaise apane ko kshama kar dooan. mujhe hi to sabase adhik abhiman ho gaya tha. maian hi to bahut bolane vali ban gayi thi. maian samajhane lagi thi ki maian boli to mere vakyoan par, mere roop par rijhakar ve apani udasinata tyagakar hamare madhy aye the. maian hi sabase adhik itarane lagi thi. maian hi chahane lagi thi ki ve mere- keval mere banakar rahean. maian unake kar khianchane ka dussahas karane lagi thi. maian roothane chali thi- ari moorkhe, chandravali! ve kripa karake apana charan sparsh tujhe de dete haian aur tujhe aj shriradha ke saman manini banane ki soojhi thi? ab marakar bhi hatabhagini tujhe shanti nahian. ve tujhe kshama kar dean, yah kis mukh se kahegi unase? ye sakhiyaan- ye shriradha ki sakhiyaan bhi dosh detian, jhi dakati to tanik shanti pati maian; kiantu ye sab itani saralaean haian ki sabaki sab gale lipatakar roti haian. sab kahati haian- 'hay sakhi! mere aparadh se hi ve rooth kar chale gaye. mujh bhagyahina ke abhiman ne tum sabako bhi vanchita bana diya. mujhe sab milakar maro, shap do! mujhe kyoan kanth se lagati ho. maian tumhare sparsh ke yogy nahian. mera amangal kalushit sharir mat chhuo!' sun! sun chandravali! yah tera aparadh sab apane-mean aropit kar rahi haian abhagini. lekin ab aise baithe to nahian raha ja sakata. ve kahaan gaye? kidhar gaye? unhean kaun batalavega? ye ashvatth, vat, pakar, kadamb, arjun- itana ooancha sir kiye kh de haian. ye door tak dekh sakate haian. ye ham avalaoan par kripa kyoan nahian karate? ye pukarane par bhi ek patr tak hilakar sanket karate nahian dikhate. ek pakshi tak us hamare hriday dhan ki or nahian u date. ye vrindavan ke taru j d to nahian haian, nishkarun bhi nahian haian; kiantu ye tapasvi haian. maunavrati haian. yah bhi to sambhav hai ki vah nishthur inase bhi chhip gaya ho. vah jhukakar inake niche se nikal gaya ho. |
sanbandhit lekh
kram sankhya | path ka nam | prishth sankhya |
varnamala kramanusar lekh khoj